darkemeralds | When do you read? How do you read? How much do you read?

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When do you read? How do you read? How much do you read?

I'm at a crossroads. No, not the demon-summoning kind. I have almost completely lost the ability to sit and read, but I want to read.

For a few years it was just books, while I was still readily able to enjoy masses of fic, and ebooks, on a portable device. Regardless of format/medium, I still loved losing myself in a story.

Now it's everything. I can't seem to sit and read anymore.

The internet is largely to blame: I recognize its adverse impact on my attention span, and that impact seems to be extreme in my case. I also acknowledge that in swapping an hour's daily commute by bus for the same commute by bike, I've exchanged one of my best reading moments for an exercise moment.

But it's not just about time. I have more time, because I've cut television hours down to two or three a week; my day to day life is pretty orderly, and frankly I pay people to do the time-consuming stuff I don't like; I need the same amount of sleep I've always needed; and my social life has taken no extraordinary leaps.

So

Do you read books? In what formats?
How would you describe your relationship to reading?
How much do you read--hours per week, books per month, however you measure it?
When? Under what circumstances?
Is there something you specifically don't do to make time for reading?
Have you noticed a decline in attention--in the ability to sit and read? And if so, how do you deal with it?

I'd really like to know.

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vambrace! Thanks for stopping by to comment. I don't know if you'll see this response, but I must thank you for your high praise of Restraint.

I couldn't agree more that reading for entertainment is pointless unless one is really entertained; a good fic is more entertaining that almost anything, in my book (no pun intended). It's just that at this point, I can't even seem to concentrate on that--that's what I'm finding distressing.

By no means do I have a goal of getting back to "real" books vetted by publishers and made of paper (though as it happens I'm trying to read one of those right now). I'd just like to regain access to reading, anything, with my eyes, and having that wonderful immersive experience again.

communicator downthread a ways points out that stress may be a bigger factor than I'd supposed in this loss of attention and concentration. Food for much thought there.

Thanks again for commenting.

I'm a proponent of the "one little thing" approach to so-called "self-improvement" or "self-healing." The thinnest possible end of the wedge, some tiny thing that will begin to pry open a crack in what seems an intractable and monolithic blockage between the stuck present and the prospect of some kind of movement. I think it has to start with the belief that it might make a difference; that the smallest thing--the only thing you're capable of right now--is still big enough to begin cracking the dam.

I say that not as a goad or even as advice, but just because I do so completely understand how you're feeling (and you express it really, really clearly--better than I ever could), that I couldn't not mention one of the basic notions that has helped me the most.

Hugs to you! You're going to find a crack in this damn thing. I just know you are.

I don't think I knew that you are a former bookstore owner. My father, also a great lover of books, went something like that route, dealing in old and rare books by mail order. He had a good eye. I'm afraid I didn't inherit it.

Not surprisingly here in Journal World, you're one of several people to have mentioned that fic has taken up a lot of reading that used to go to "real" books. I have no quarrel with that at all--I view it as part of the fascinating and massive cultural and economic shift happening as a result of highly distributed information, and heaven knows fanfic was a mainstay of my reading life until I apparently lost the ability to read at all.

I like your practical approach to the attention problem: go to the cinema, lock the door, switch to herb tea. Sane steps to take, and man, what a powerful statement this is: "doing only one thing at a time as an anti-stress measure."

I need to take that to heart. I think there's a huge clue for me there. Thank you for it.

I'm pretty much online from the moment I wake up to the moment I turn out the lights at night--and with my new Android phone, I can even reach over in my sleep and be online on the tiny screen. It's crazed.

Fanfic is very non-demanding, isn't it? Even the best of it, the really well-written and challenging stuff, being free, is easy enough to bypass if it doesn't appeal. I think it's probably inevitable that all reading is going in that direction, very much like music: there is just so much of it out there, and it's become so nearly free, that we can taste and sample and experiment and move on.

It can't be good for the focus and concentration, but I'm not sure how to correct for other than adhering artificially to old standards and traditions just for the sake of tradition.

And speaking of books, I've been meaning to tell you that the Butler's Guide book arrived a couple of weeks ago and I've been implementing many of his methods, especially with regard to leather care and silver polishing. And now that I'm planning another trip at last, I'm eager to try his folding and packing tips.

It's a wonderful book!

Oh boy do I identify with the "is it reasonable to 'give myself a break'" scenario. All my friends label me as an "over-achiever" but I know that, given the chance, I will lie on the floor and read (boring) romance novels for months at a time (been there, done that, though it was a very long time ago). I rescued myself from this pit of depression by going off and doing "something else", which involved moving to San Francisco, going back to school and getting divorced. Three or four years later I began two years of talk therapy with an extremely useful psycho therapist that gave me a bunch of tools for dealing with depression. I quit therapy when I realized I had nothing more to learn from that therapist.

The next therapist I saw (some 7 years ago) suggested that I should really "give myself a break".... Which was both good advice, and just goes to show that we should all strive for balance in our lives.

Reading these days: sporadic.
I read for at least three reasons:
For escapist entertainment.
To educate myself about the next thing I want to accomplish.
History. History is always amazing.

For big chunks of the last 6 or 7 years I've been too exhausted mentally and physically to read much. That is slowly changing as I relax into this house and the fact that we have FIXED most of it. There are no huge looming projects. That frees some of my attention to return to fun fiction. Fun fiction seems to have become pretty sparse on the ground. I'm old enough that many new writers seem pretty young. Yes they are exploring ideas that are, or could be, interesting, but the perspective is of a 25 year old, not a 55 year old. Some people choose to be Peter Pan, and sometimes I do a fair imitation, but more and more I want thoughtful fiction that addresses issues more in line with my age demographic. This means I really enjoy the writers who manage to push a few buttons, or speak to issues I haven't yet completely thought through; or better yet, write so beautifully that I can't put this adventure story down.

Still that feeling of being withdrawn from the outer world to deal with the inner world is familiar to me. In my case, when I began figuring out what was bugging me, I also freed my attention to read.

Oh, and "transitions" in life? I really just think that is just called "life". Certainly my life has been little but a long string of "transitions" into a different state!

If you have any sleep issues you should look at formats which do not produce their own light. Such things are disruptive of the sleep cycle.

It's like...a Baedecker to The Past Is Another Country!

It is! And there are a lot of good things you can still get at that duty-free shop.

this totally sounds like me. i used to read harlequin romances and some, for some reason, westerns, and a lot of scifi/fantasy. a book a day for years. in school i would read instead of paying attention. i am positive i read at least 352 books a year, sometimes more, during my freshman and sophmore years of highschool.

i would troll the bookstores, used and new, and spend at least $30 a month on books.

now, all i do is read j2 or spn. i go through so much fic it's ridiculous. i do re-read old stuff especially when i come across sequels!

i keep buying books, much less than before, for series that i love (like jim butcher's harry dresden, or jd ward's brotherhood, or patricia brigg's mercy thompson...) but havne't read the damn things 'cause i'm too caught up in j2! (and omg i just bookmarked like 5 new fics today!) i follow all the bigbang comms...

I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one that has done this.

As I read your reply and ranunculus's above, I remembered my mother complaining about my Dad reading lots of dumb romance novels and such, when he "could write something so much better." He went through PILES of them - westerns, as well.

You know, I hadn't thought about it as "withdrawing from the outer world to deal with the inner world," but that is a very apt statement. What's more, it sounds very reasonable when put that way.

And thanks for reminding me that life is nothing but a series of transitions. I realized this morning that I would happily continue freelancing out of my house as long as jobs and work continue to come in. I honestly DON'T long for the corporate shackles. I have always had an upsurge in my depression when having to deal with that. That's probably why I loved my low stakes, simple tasks, lots of strokes job that I left in November.

I continue to seek that balance. My most recent therapy experience reminds me of yours - she stopped me and asked if I was aware how very often I was saying "should" "ought to" "have to" - all of which are indicators that I'm beating myself up. It's also much the cause of my occasional "bratty" periods of rebellion against ALL constraints - even the most reasonable ones.

I remember nearly 20 years ago, as I was eating lunch in the office cafeteria, someone that had observed my voracious reading habits stopping to ask me "how I motivated myself to read." It was such a foreign concept to me, because if anything, I had to motivate myself to STOP reading.

It still is pretty foreign - and maybe I should give myself a break on the "preferring fanfic" front. I'm falling into the snobby attitude trap of people that don't read it - that it must be unworthy, even when I KNOW BETTER.

It's like anything - there are good writers and mediocre writers and poor writers. There is a HELL of a lot of stuff - your massive achievement with "Restraint" being an incredible example - that is far superior to many books I've consumed on wood pulp and ink.

However, I might now get a taste of my lunchtime inquisitor's attitude when it comes to the "harder" reading that I've not been doing.

Partly as a result of this meme, partly as a result of some references in a fanfic I recently read, I actually went to the library yesterday and checked out a couple of books - one of Terry Pratchett's Discworld books and one Neil Gaiman. I read about 20 pages of Pratchett's "The Time Thief" before going to sleep. His lack of chapter breaks is actually an encouragement to not beat myself up with a one-chapter-a-day requirement (my first inclination).

It helps that the book is light and clever - two of my personal earmarks of an excellent read.

I have never overcome my addiction to bedtime reading - I can NOT sleep without it. This has resulted in sleep disruptions due to my computer's LED screen.

Anything that requires consideration and action, which calls on our reserves of emotional strength is going to be so much harder if we're under stress.

You're the second person today, in this thread, to mention the sleep-disrupting effects of an LED screen. I had no idea. It makes me lean more than ever towards a Kindle, as digital ink doesn't flicker.

I think you're smart to set aside considerations of "literary merit" in your reading. There are plenty (plenty!) of people out there who would turn their nose up at Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman simply because they're genre writers. I like a great piece of literary fiction as much as the next snob, but I'm not drawn to it for comfort the way I am to genre writing--and fanfic is genre writing. It's its own genre.

I'm making a bit of progress on my own re-motivation to read project: I'm putting in 15 to 30 minutes before sleep, and the commitment has also revitalized my commitment to the vision exercises I was having a hard time making myself do. So this whole conversation has begun to turn things around a bit for me.

Another thing it has made me realize--and this may be relevant to your interests--is that adding another item to my To-Do List when I'm already too busy to read is probably not my best strategy. I need to relax a little. And lo and behold, focusing on that--on de-stressing and relaxing--has suddenly loosened up my time, just enough to enjoy a bit of reading.

I agree completely with CookieMom, that changing the "escapist" self-accusation to the idea of "withdrawing from the outer world to deal with the inner world" is an excellent reframe.

I'm 55 too and I find that a lot of fiction is pretty meaningless to me for the reasons you mention. It's harder to find "nourishing" fiction as I get older.

I also do quite a bit of non-fiction reading (some history) because I find that it fills my mind better and challenges my thinking.

It's rare for me to read books to educate myself for my next accomplishment, because I find most of what's relevant to my interests on the internet. But I read a LOT on the internet for those kinds of reasons.

And yes. Life is transitions.

Fanfic has really freed up your budget!

Actually, it has had a big impact on my book-spending. I know that one of the reasons some professional authors hate it is simply that: it is changing the way a small but growing segment of the book-buying public reads.

You are my best source of recs for J2 and SPN fic, though (as is the point of this whole post) I'm finding it awfully difficult to do much reading these days.

I'm hearing that mentioned a lot, and I had no idea.

The Kindle is completely non-lighted and non-flickery. Digital ink--people who own one (including my 81-year old mother) love its book-like qualities.

My issues with the Kindle have nothing to do with its light emissions. They have to do with the fact that with a Kindle you can only purchase Amazon books (this may be changing as we speak, but that is my info at the moment). This makes the provider of the machine and the provider of the books as the sole source. Ultimately this is a REALLY BAD IDEA if you care about freedom of information. In its inception it isn't much of a concern, but it does tie you to one point of view.

Personally I'm considering implementing the blackout curtain material I have (commando cloth), since I have a street light not far from my bedroom window. Apparently melatonin levels (important for good sleep) are affected by any light source present during the sleep cycle. I live in a big city and it is -Never- really dark. Having grown up on the Ranch, I know what dark is, and if I forget any trip up there will remind me.

"bratty" periods of rebellion against ALL constraints - even the most reasonable ones.

*L* I have occasional "bratty" periods too.

I read, a lot! I remember reading everything and anything when I was small, and I LOVE books. I love the old-fashion books, nothing like the feel of paper between your hands, still can't get into Kindles and such, and I can't read from the tiny screens of handphones! I used to read magazines too ( front to back, the editorials, the ads! ) but I no longer have the time for that.

If I could, I'd read all day long lol. As it is, I read when I'm waiting in line at the banks etc, I read when eating, I read just before going to sleep. I draw the line at reading in the toilets though lol.

It used to be one book every three days or so but since I discovered fanfics on the internet, my time for book-reading has sadly decreased, but that doesn't stop me from buying books!

It seems very nearly unanimous: those who still read, read a lot of fanfic where books used to be, and nearly everyone will admit to reading less than they used to. It doesn't surprise me that my flist is composed of serious, committed readers, though.

I'm wondering if I'll transition back through fanfic to books, or what. Since posting this, I've decided to commit to reading fifteen minutes a day for pleasure. Doesn't have to be a paper book or even a published book, but glancing distractedly through a short fic on someone's LJ doesn't count. It has to be reading.

So far, I've managed two days out of three. I'm not sure it's recoverable.

I've been thinking about your curtain idea all day. I need something like that! I don't suppose IKEA has ready-made blackout curtains...

If they don't, Home Depot or other DIY store should have light-excluding window shades, and then you put whatever kind of decorative curtains you like over the shades.

Probably no pre-made blackout curtains which will really work, this from my experience as a stagehand trying to really block sunlight. The venetian blinds that are supposed to block light don't do a very good job around the edges. Heavy, lined drapes do pretty well, but can be expensive.
The reason I mentioned commando cloth is that it is very tightly woven so light does not penetrate (though you still have to cover the entire glass area plus). Contact your local theatrical rental shop and ask if they carry it. Tell them you want to buy a couple of yards. No duvetyne will not work in the same way, it doesn't have the tight weave. Either one of these is the "poor man's velour".
Errr, I hope this is helpful!

Theatrical rental! What a great idea. Thank you.

I'm now scouring the web for blackout cloth. Cool! Am designing curtains in my head.

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