darkemeralds: A round magical sigil of mysterious meaning, in bright colors with black outlines. A pen nib is suggested by the intersection of the cryptic forms. (Default)
[personal profile] darkemeralds
In the Twelve Step programs, they talk about "the progressive nature of our disease," suggesting that alcoholism or addiction keeps operating in our lives and getting worse, even though we're not drinking or using.

The X-Files movie is like that. In the years since the show was finally put out of our misery after its ninth season, the X-Files concept has just gone on getting worse and worse, seen by no one, untreated, unrecovered, and this movie is like the bender it finally went on.



The first half hour or so was good enough that I was starting to wonder where all the bad reviews were coming from. Nice set-up, showing that the Mulder-Scully relationship has progressed in ways that seem quite realistic in the X-Files universe. Interesting if gruesome storyline involving a psychic and perhaps a serial killer--good X-Files stock in trade.

Then wham, it goes to hell with a ridiculously bad plotline involving evil Russian experiments and evil Callum Keith Rennie with an evil (and not very good) Russian accent and evil blackened teeth so even though he plays his patented straight-seeming gay man, it's not one bit hot at ALL, so, disappointment there.

Plus? Plus, the CKR character, as near as we could figure out, is slowly working to replace his married-in-Massachusetts same-sex spouse with female parts, one by one, which made no sense and I honestly was embarrassed for CKR having to deliver the dumb lines he delivered.

I'd've been embarrassed for David Duchovny too, but mostly he phoned 'em in anyway so it's not like he was really present for the show. Gillian Anderson had the least ridiculous lines and did her usual lovely, restrained thing with them while looking a) her age and b) gorgeous.



To say, "Well, that was two hours of my life I'll never get back," however, would be misstating the case. My niece and my mom and I had loads of fun laughing about the movie's delirious badness all the way home. My hope is that the X-Files gets the help it needs, and stops making movies, one day at a time, forever.
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darkemeralds: A round magical sigil of mysterious meaning, in bright colors with black outlines. A pen nib is suggested by the intersection of the cryptic forms. (Default)
darkemeralds

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