The Ink-Pot and the Palette

...who else thinks Impastor is hilarious? Because I do.

The one-year mark in the don't-work-no-more phase of my career has come and gone, and I find that I want some structure back in my life. I feel ready to emerge from my cave a little and reconnect, too.

So maybe I can do a post a day for a month.

Boy, am I rusty. Whew. Let's see... [self-censor kicks into high gear: "No, that's unoriginal. No, that would be whiny. No, that sounds like a commercial..."]

( Screw you, self-censor. )

I still feel like I'm just on vacation. Today, as I begin my fourth week of retirement, I officially exceed my previous record for most consecutive days off work since 1989.

I was doing the night-owl thing to an unhealthy degree the first week or two, but that's wearing off, and today I actually got up a little before 9:00 a.m. That seems a decent hour for getting out of bed in the morning, don't you think? Civilized.

Everyone who recommended taking plenty of time before imposing a new structure on myself: you were so right. Thank you.

And as to how I'm spending my time? roxymissrose Someone whose name shall be crossed out in a transparent attempt to point blamey, blamey fingers, mentioned re-watching "All Hell Breaks Loose" (the last two episodes of Supernatural Season 2) and was all OMG it's still so powerful and amazing, so I was going to Netflix it and then I thought what the hey I'll just watch all of S2, and now...

...Now I'm having a heart attack all over again watching the Impala get smashed into by a semi, and Sam is yelling "DEAN!!!" and the helicopters are coming, and I'm remembering how absolutely great this show was and why I've been such a fan all these years.

(And wow, Jensen doesn't age.)

This is the best scene ever written for television. Was anyone else as bowled over by it as I was?

( Elementary 2.09 )

There have been quite a few well-meaning Joan Watsons in my own life over the years who accepted me as I was while rooting for me to become nicer. Some of them had letters after their names and billed my insurance by the hour. And I was fully on board the "cure me of being me" train for years.

What else could I do? I'm not a brilliant detective or an attractive and financially independent white male--things that allow all versions of Sherlock Holmes to withstand the consequences of being fundamentally--what's the word? Attachment-disordered? Spock-like? A wee bit sociopathic? Introverted? Poorly-socially-networked? A natural loner? An edge-dweller?

It's a strange minority position to be in. The scene emphasizes the strong belief among more connected humans that we edge-dwellers could join the majority if we just tried a little harder.

So we try, most of us, most of the time. Often our livelihood depends on it. If I'd been born a couple of generations earlier, the need to conform to a "marriageable" standard of nice-girl behavior would have been nearly a matter of life and death.

None of this is to disregard the advantages I do have in life--I have them, I make use of them, and I'm grateful for them. (As it happens, I think my combination of coldness and competence has just plain scared employers into keeping me on and paying me a salary all these years. And now I get to retire.)

Nor am I advocating for antisocial behavior. I'm not completely separate from the continent, and yes, the bell tolls for me, too. I abide by common please-and-thank-you standards, and what I care about, I care about deeply. I experience enjoyment and pleasure in non-evil things like laughter and food. I'm capable of love, albeit to a limited extent: I let things and people go much more easily than others do. I've tried not to, but I just don't care as much as I "should."

Jason Tracey, who wrote this episode of Elementary, has perfectly captured the tension between the edge-dweller and the more connected among us, and that's no small thing. But the scene goes a bit further by explicitly stating the edge-dweller's acceptance of himself and the consequences of his nature. Sherlock knows--and does not regret--that his nature is what makes him good at the singular thing he's really good at.

That's what made it revolutionary for me.

Actually better than the teaser/trailers. Lots of good Jossy lines. The big black airplane ("People tend to confuse the words 'new' and 'improved'") reminds me an awful lot of Serenity, with its drop ramp, cavernous interior, and dangerous side-engines. The set, like so many of Joss's key sets, has two real stories (get it?) and lots of room to move (remember the Hyperion? The Dollhouse? Wolfram and Hart?). I saw one tweet deriding the camera work, but I found the first episode visually appealing, and I'm so happy to let the Joss-isms wash over me.

( Some spoilery squee )

And in conclusion: Yes! Good show! I'll be back for more.

I just...

I'm sitting here watching "Sleepy Hollow," grinning at the ridiculous goodness and badness of it. It's like...so probably going to be cancelled but might catch fire. It's indescribable, but it has American legend + Apocalypse + a little bit of Clancy Brown + a very appealing lead woman of color + stupid fish-out-of-water time-travel jokes + you know, Headless Horseman. Of the Apocalypse.

And this one guy with a really beautiful nose playing Ichabod Crane. I mean. Sleepy Hollow. I think it might be love. Ridiculous, ill-advised love.

Man, did Jeff Davis and Company go to Pacing School over the hiatus? By wasting zero seconds of screen time on Scott and Allison making out or werewolves doing the risible all-fours run through the woods, they actually have quality time for all the characters!

( Some slightly spoilery squee )

I don't know what's come over me. I got the urge to watch Dawson's Creek a couple of weeks ago. I have no clear idea why. I resisted for a while, and then bam, I got out my otherwise-completely-useless tablet the other day, logged into my rarely-used Netflix account, and hit Season 1, Episode 1.

I've been binge-watching ever since.

Despite being way too old for it even at when it aired, I loved it. Not in a fannish way--I never felt the least desire to ship anyone or read fic--but I found it engaging, funny, and touching and I never missed an ep. It was like an internal do-over for my own youth. Those kids got to say all the things I wish I'd been able to say when I was that age. It was cathartic.

It's held up rather well over the 15 years since it debuted. I'm amazed at how many specific scenes (with specific songs) I remember vividly, and at how satisfying it is to see them again and find that they're as good as I remembered. And rewatching the early episodes knowing how the story ends is surprisingly moving.

I guess as vices go, a binge rewatch of Dawson's Creek is pretty tame. But I'm having fun.

Oh, and look who guest-starred in one of the first episodes:

Can you say "Uncle Peter before he became a psychopath"?

EDITED ON JUNE 11 TO ADD A NOTE TO SELF: The binge-watching was a clue that I'd already been triggered for the big breakdown of June 9.

If this isn't making the rounds, it totally needs to. Thanks prime_meridian!

How Merlin is, in fact, the Doctor

Where are they going with Hathaway?

( Musing about Lewis 6.03 - spoilers )