Resolution

WHEREAS fitness clubs are made of mirrors; and

WHEREAS discouragement, resignation and embarrassment all actually, literally weaken the muscles; and

WHEREAS the purpose of being in a fitness club is, in part, to strengthen the muscles; and

WHEREAS saggy, baggy, sloppy, oversized exercise clothes, however comfy in theory, do not disguise the remaining thirty excess pounds, but emphasize them;

BE IT THEREFORE RESOLVED that DarkEmeralds will wear exercise clothes that actually fit, and damn the voice in her head that says "but they don't cover my big ass."