darkemeralds: A round magical sigil of mysterious meaning, in bright colors with black outlines. A pen nib is suggested by the intersection of the cryptic forms. (Chart)
[personal profile] darkemeralds


I guess it's fair to say that at about 35% of the way into my planned weight loss, I'm in the middle phase. The thrill of starting is over. The excitement of conquering initial obstacles (like hunger) is over. I'm not yet to another major milestone in clothing size or number on the scale.

Right now, it's just the long, long slog. And on top of that, I've been stuck on an annoying plateau for almost two weeks. All the science and logic says that I'm still burning fat at at least a pound a week, but the scale isn't yet concurring. Bloat, water, inadequate "throughput"--these are the likely explanation.

Tonight, for the first time in the nearly four months since I started this project, I've had the following Bad Thoughts:
  • Maybe this isn't worth it
  • Maybe it's stopped working
  • Maybe I'm secretly cheating, or eating in my sleep, or lying to myself about my food (Note: I'm not.)
  • Maybe my body defies the laws of physics or has a special kind of metabolism that prevents any further fat loss no matter how carefully I stay under my calorie limit
  • Maybe there's some "catch," some trick I haven't learned yet, in the absence of which I will never get off this plateau
  • ...and so on

Well, it is worth it--and it's not as if this diet is any trouble or causing me any discomfort. I'm in the groove, and it's easy. I don't feel deprived--just a little disgruntled that the same efforts which were burning off fat at a nice steady rate throughout late December and January should suddenly seem to stop working.

I need some perspective. This is a very large project. It's an organic, biological process. It doesn't proceed in straight lines. I don't yet know all there is to know about it, and there's a long journey ahead. If I leave the chosen path after so small a test, I just return to the wilderness.

I like the path. It's way too soon to think of quitting.

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darkemeralds: A round magical sigil of mysterious meaning, in bright colors with black outlines. A pen nib is suggested by the intersection of the cryptic forms. (Default)
darkemeralds

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